Happy birthday for tomorrow brother.

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2019-01-12 cosford (1 of 1)

I made myself leave the house and do some photography today, and hadn’t visited RAF Cosford for some time. There was a subconscious reason for me visiting Wolverhampton, linked to a recent event, but the air museum is always good for engineering related photographs. Here is one example of my photos today.

Do I feel a sense of accomplishment? Not really. Do I feel happier? Not really. Do I like my photos? No, never. But, I did go out. That has to be a good thing.

If you live in the Midlands, you should go and visit RAF Cosford. It’s free! Click below to visit the website.

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I went to a friends funeral yesterday, not a great start to January, but it was a lovely service, and as is often the case with well loved people, the party afterwards was impressive. Tonight, slightly worse for wear, sitting in my local, I find myself reflecting on the life of a father I hardly knew. I’ve cried tears on behalf of a family who don’t even know I exist, as I’m not allowed to show sorrow.

It’s exhausting, and I’m losing strength fast. I look haunted. I’m not sure we’d have even liked each other. I don’t know if he ever thought of me, or stole a look at my Facebook profile. A simple message would have meant so much to me, but as usual fate has the final word, and I’m left dumbfounded. Lost.

I’ll be back to good photography soon, I promise. I hope.

Definitely not the best day ever. To grieve for a person you never knew is a strange feeling. To be so integral to their life, yet so closed out from their end, is a bleak experience. I could have reached out, but I chose not to. It’s a decision I must live with forever. Sorry I can’t add a picture.

2018-12-11 One Canada Square (Edited) (1 of 1)I was in Canary Wharf in early December on work related duties. As I was passing this corridor, open to the street, I was reminded of the Death Star, simply expecting Darth Vader and a detachment of Stormtroopers to appear at the other end.